 Triggered, melting down, freaking out, tantrum. No matter what you call it, we all have those moments, whether you are 2 or 42. As adults we tend to navigate them a little bit better than a 2 year old, but not always. While I was on staff at Trinitarian Church we had been discussing the idea of having a meltdown script. We started to use it when one of us was in the throes of freaking out and a few deep breaths didn’t seem to pull us back in. I say us, really I should say I or me. I’m the one that freaks out and has a hard time returning back to the truth. So the idea is reading something I wrote when I wasn’t freaking out and had the ability to hear God clearly and can remind myself of the best ways to bring me back to “reality”. So what is reality? For me it’s realizing, I am in God’s presence right now. He’s not some far off God waiting to come down, he dwells within me. It’s realizing there are two of me at war within myself, it’s learning to give myself grace to stumble and fall. These are the statements that call me back to Jesus. These are the things that give me a reality check about what I want in life. Do I want the house, job, and kids (nothing wrong with that, if that’s what God has called you to!) or do I want to surrender my own desires to follow Jesus? I wish I could give you a resounding, of course! I always choose Jesus. The reality is that I more often than not choose my own way. I choose not to trust God. I choose to provide for and protect myself. This is stupid. It’s like asking a toddler to provide for and protect themselves while crossing a big highway. They aren’t smart enough to navigate that by themselves. I am not smart enough to navigate life without God. A phrase we try to repeat at Trinitarian is: “God you are smart, and we are stupid.” Somedays I know it and walk in humility trusting fully in my Jesus to take care of me and guide me in the right path. Other days I turn from him and his truth and try to cross the highway myself. Sometimes I even make it across, but more often than not I get banged up as I try to do it on my own. Then I look back and say why did you let this happen? Well, you crossed without me. Such a simple concept, and yet we’ve believed the lies that Satan has fed us that God is withholding from us, or that we don’t need him. So what does your script look like? What calls you back to following after Jesus and trusting in him? Take some time to pray about it and ask God to help you write your script. He knows what will call you back.
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